Monday Fun...

"But... For Wales...?"

I do like You Tube. I was chatting with Leutgeb the other day and she reminded me of the quip by St. Thomas More in A Man for All Seasons (it's in the film: I don't know if St. Thomas actually did say it!) where he says to Sir Richard Rich: "Why Richard, it profits a man nothing to give his soul for the whole world... but for Wales?? "

I thought I'd see if I could find the clip, and, sure enough, here it is... among several other witty lines. They don't make films like this any more!

Gaudete !

Although I had been organised enough to buy my Christmas stamps this year, I was less successful in getting an Advent wreath sorted. I was sure I'd be able to get purple and pink candles from the local art and crafts superstore (they sell everything else for making Christmas decorations and wreaths, and they had them last year) and so I was pretty horrified to discover that their selection of coloured candles had been seriously downsized... there were lots of red, green, gold and white candles, even black candles (I really don't want to begin to think about why anyone would want black candles!) but no purple ones.

After frantically scouring the shops, and even quite a few internet outlets, I managed to find some purple and pink pillar candles. They were a pretty sorry sight, with the purple ones being more pink than purple, and they really smelled ghastly. I was so annoyed, I didn't bother trying to find any greenery to pretty them up a bit, I just stuck them on a glittery-gold plate...

I haven't bothered with a tree for many years, mostly because I've always gone away for Christmas itself, and leaving a cat at home alone with what is effectively a climbing frame and dangly cat toys is asking for trouble. I do, however, always hanker after a Christmas tree: being of German extraction, one would expect nothing less! Some friends of mine decided to help me out this year, and they bought me a ready-decorated tree... so I put the tree up on Gaudete Sunday...

Admittedly, it was printed on a plastic sheet...

However, after looking at it for, ooooh, all of five minutes, I realised that I just couldn't live with it. I was, after all, my mother's daughter, and I had been brought up with very strict rules of tree decoration.

I decided to look for a small Christmas tree in a pot. After trying a couple of florists and a supermarket, I thought I'd pop along to the local DIY superstore. Most of the trees were far too big, but I spotted a reasonable-looking specimen sitting forlornly on a table. Unable to believe my luck at such a swift and satisfactory result, I made a beeline for it. I was promptly accosted by a middle-aged woman who appeared out of nowhere...

"Excuse me! That's mine! I have only just put that pot down while I looked for my husband!"

Scouring the shelves, I eventually found another candidate. It was less Christmas-tree-like than the first tree, but I hoped that the branches would settle once I'd put on some decorations - my mother had always needed to allow for settling overnight. Triumphant, I brought home my prize...

...which suddenly, at home, began to look rather less Christmassy than it had in the shop. In fact, it had rather a spindly, hedge-like quality about it...

I had assumed that the branches were held up by twine, and that they would spread out once the twine was removed. Unfortunately, on closer inspection, no twine was in evidence. I rang my mother for advice, and sent her a photo. "That's not a Christmas tree," she opined, "that's a spruce!"

I was able to confirm this, as the label declared that the plant was a spruce... but I had assumed that, as a spruce was a pine tree, a spruce was also a Christmas tree. Apparently not...

Undeterred, I went to unearth my old Christmas tree decorations. I particularly wanted to find my super-snazzy, candle-shaped, tree lights. Alas, I discovered that the candles were almost as big as the branches they were supposed to sit on, and the branches couldn't take the weight. So, no lights.

I did, however, manage to decorate the tree eventually... and, having done that, I decided to see if I could find my Christmas crib, which had been packed away somewhere safe...

Imagine my delight on discovering that, along with the carefully-packed crib, I had wrapped up some purple and pink candles for my Advent wreath...

So now I feel I can observe the rest of Advent properly! Gaudete!

... I still haven't managed to write any Christmas cards though!

New Charity Shop...

The Sisters of the Gospel of Life have opened up a new outlet, hoping to get the pro-life message out.

If you are in Glasgow at any point, the shop, Precious Things, is at 651 Cathcart Road, and the Sisters would be delighted to see you.

Please keep this new venture, and all the wonderful work of the Sisters and the Cardinal Winning Pro-Life Initiative in your prayers.

You can still make a donation to the Sisters via the PayPal button on their blog's sidebar, or you can send items for the mothers and babies in their care direct to 106 Dixon Avenue, Glasgow, G42 8EL.

Guilt...

The past couple of years, what with one thing and another, I have failed in the general Christmas card area.

I have bought Christmas cards a-plenty. All really nice religious cards.

And then I have omitted to write any. Or I wrote them and forgot to send them.

Last year, I had a bit of a strop because the Post Office "ran out" of Christmas stamps (the religious ones, that is!) and so I sulked and didn't quite get round to posting any cards.

Leutgeb's organisational skills have shamed me into resolving to do better this year.

Two weeks ago I managed to buy stamps - and got the proper Christmas stamps. I have loads and loads of pristine cards, unearthed during my tidying up earlier in the year.

But that was as far as I'd got.

So, this evening, I thought I'd make the effort to print out the address labels. I have all my contact addresses on computer, lovingly typed, and so didn't particularly want to write out a whole load of envelopes by hand....

Unfortunately, because my phone uses Microsoft Outlook as the default address program, I have the same program on my computer. And the version of Outlook is, for some reason known only to Bill Gates, incompatible with my (newer) version of Word. And Outlook won't allow me to do a mail merge unless I have the right (older) version of Word...

*sigh*

It has taken me the best part of two and a half hours to sort out the compatibility issues. That means I have spent 150 minutes printing out 50 labels... which works out at 3 minutes per label...

I'm now tired and irritable. Actually writing the cards will now have to wait until another day... hopefully before 2010!

Does This Make Me A Trend-Setter...?

The students at school are catching on... they all want to know what my latest desktop background from the I Can Has Cheezburger? site is... apparently, LOLcats are definitely "in" and this means that I've been upgraded to the "pretty-clued-up-for-an-old-person" category...

One of my colleagues has decided that she wants to have cat pictures on her desktop.

There is a degree of one-upmanship going on, though. She intends to have pictures of her own cat... in a Santa hat and jacket.

I would not submit Sylvester to such an indignity.

My colleague has also admitted that she takes her cat for a walk down to the shops (on a harness and lead contraption.) Teaching does weird things to a person...

The Snowman...With A Twist...

I was visiting some friends one evening when I spotted a little picture book belonging to one of their children. In pictures, but without words, it went through the story of The Snowman by Raymond Briggs. I'd never seen the film or read the book, but had heard (ad nauseam) the song by Aled Jones... everyone raved on about how wonderful the film was, and the music, etc. etc.

However, a few years ago, an advert for a soft drink completely changed my (lack of) appreciation for the song... Here's Irn Bru's version of events...

More From The Weekend...

It was a busy weekend... Sunday saw our Parish Carol Service. It was held in conjunction with one of the local funeral directors, as it was last year, so forms quite an ecumenical event. The funeral directors invite anyone who has held a funeral with them during the year to come along and remember their loved ones on this first Christmas, and prayers for the dead are recited. There were a couple of guest soloists (I must confess to finding their choice of music rather odd) a few Bible verses and a poem, and our own regular choir and children's choir.

As is often the case at these sort of events, many favourite carols had to be left out (there just wouldn't have been time to sing everything) but there was a good selection... and best of all, no horrible "gender neutral" versions of the traditional carols!

I couldn't resist taking a few photos...

I managed to catch all of the children's choir members with Fr. Tim...

The Parish UCM had excelled themselves with the refreshments, and you can see that it was very well attended...

Finally, I managed to persuade Hilda, our Parish UCM President, to pose for this photo with Fr. Tim... she does an amazing job getting people to volunteer for events such as this.

More Monday Madness...

My regular Monday post for all you cat lovers out there! Today's offering is especially dedicated to Brother Nicodemus Mary of the Transalpine Redemptorists on Papa Stronsay... He wrote and told me that, with rogue rats swimming between the islands in Orkney, the Community has four cats to help to keep the Community rodent-free, and Brother Nicodemus has the job of feeding the cats...

So, I sincerely hope that none of your kitties decide to join Weightwatchers...

Many Blessings...

As I said in a previous post, I renewed my vows on Saturday. I first made my vows seven years ago, and I can honestly say that I haven't regretted my decision, not even once.

Of course, having lived the life for seven years, I sometimes forget how strange my decision might appear to others, especially people who don't go to church themselves. This was really brought home to me this year...

First of all, there was my conversation with my hairdressers. The senior stylist has known me for a few years, so she knew the general score, but the junior who was assisting her wanted to know if I was a nun... once I'd cleared that one up, I then had to explain that no, this wasn't the reason I always wore black... I just liked wearing black.

While waiting for my hair tint to develop, I thought I'd treat myself to a manicure, as the beautician at the salon wasn't busy... nothing fancy, no false nails, just a moisturising treatment for the cuticles, the nails shaped and polish applied. She also asked what I was up to at the weekend. On hearing that I was a Catholic, she started to tell me that her boyfriend was a lapsed Catholic, and they were considering marriage, but the young man's family told her that she had to be baptised Catholic before they could marry in church. I quickly put her right on this point, and we spent about half an hour discussing marriage, the need for Catholics to marry in church, the cost (minimal) of marrying in church, vows, children, baptism, living in sin, divorce rates among people who didn't cohabit, the need for Confession and faith.

Saturday morning dawned, and I phoned for a cab, as I intended to have a drink at the party after the service. The driver was one who had collected me several times before (I'm a creature of habit) and he was keen to know what I was celebrating.

On hearing that I was renewing my vows, he looked puzzled. "Isn't your other half supposed to be with you when you do that?" he asked, "...or is he already at the church?"

I explained that my "other half" was, so to speak, God. Watching his expression (in the driver's rearview mirror) was very entertaining... I could almost see the thoughts churning round, followed by a hesitant "But... if you don't mind me asking... does that mean that you can't have a boyfriend...?"

The journey was, mercifully, a short one (15 minutes), but we managed to touch on vows, sex outside marriage, Original Sin, the variety of different religions and denominations, Henry VIII and the Reformation, death, judgement, hell and heaven. I'm not used to quite so much theology before 10am!

The Missa Cantata was wonderful as usual, and the schola sang beautifully.

We had a short service of Benediction; I love this devotion - something about how God abases himself before us, the creatures He loves so much, as He condescends to appear in the form of a little fragment of bread...

And after Mass, we had the service where I renewed my vows. First, we had a reading from St. Francis de Sales: a short passage which seemed to be written especially for me. Fr. Tim gave a short sermon, but I'm afraid that, although I remember it being excellent, I was so moved by the whole thing that I can't remember any of it. I do seem to recall that vocations were mentioned!

The schola intoned the Litany of Saints. I had brought my St. Andrew's Missal with me, and was fascinated to discover that St. Hieronymus is Latin for St. Jerome! There were some more prayers, the vows themselves, and sprinkling with holy water... and there I was, "done and dusted" for another year.

Members of the Parish UCM had agreed to take care of the catering, and I think you'll agree that they did an amazing job...

Delia insisted on taking a photo of me. I agreed, only because she said it would be from the back, and on my camera. It was a ghastly photo, and I've deleted it... (sorry, Delia!)

I had a beautiful day, and would like to thank everyone (present in person or in spirit!) for their kind comments, messages of support and prayers.

A Little Advent Humour...

I saw this video on Creative Minority Report, and it made me laugh out loud. Silent monks singing the Hallelujah Chorus... you really have to check it out!

The Papa Stronsay Calendar...

On Thursday, Fr. Tim put up a post about the 2010 Calendars produced by the Transalpine Redemptorists of Papa Stronsay Island. Later that evening, after Benediction, he popped into the Parish Club to show a few of us the calendar... Jonathan can be seen inspecting it in this photo...

I liked the calendar so much that I decided to order one from their blog. It's pretty easy - you can either click on the button on the blog's left-hand sidebar to be taken to the PayPal site, or you can send your address (via the message form) and the number of copies you would like, and they will invoice you.

The calendar follows the 1962 Ordo, and it also notes several anniversaries which occur in 2010: for example, St. Paul was shipwrecked on the Island of Malta 1950 years ago. It helps to remind us that the Saints are real, they are not just "nice ideals" of what a person should be, they actually existed, and the Church has a record of when they lived. This is more important than you might realise - especially for the young, who view anyone over 25 as having one foot in the grave. I still remember the terrific jolt I got when I read that there have been 266 popes (including Pope Benedict XVI) and the Church has a record of all their names...

It is important to support this and other religious communities, as they do such stirling work: hidden away from the world, but continuing to pray for the rest of us, all the while offering their lives as an oblation to God. Visit the blog, leave a message of encouragement, subscribe to their newspaper, buy a calendar... and say a prayer for them all.

Renewing My Vows...

It's a big day today - I'm renewing my vows, something I do each year. Although I consider the vows to be permanent, renewing them helps me to focus on how faithfully (or not) I am living up to the promises I made. If you want to know what those promises were, you can see them HERE. And if you are wondering why I made them, I try to explain a little more HERE.

The whole thing kicks off this morning at 10:30am with the usual monthly Missa Cantata at Our Lady of the Rosary, Blackfen. Mass is followed by Benediction. There is then a brief pause (basically to allow the schola and Fr. Tim to draw breath) and the service where I renew my vows starts at 12noon. It's a short one, the highlight being the Litany of Saints, which this year is in the traditional form. The down-side to this is that I can't just slot in my favourite saints, as the list is set. Hopefully they will understand!

Refreshments will follow in the small hall, prepared by the UCM. I had hoped to arrange for the party to be in the Large Hall, but there is a charity event booked in. Blackfen is a busy place. Next year I'll make sure I have done the paperwork in triplicate!

Several of you have left messages of support and prayers. Thank you all very much, I am extremely touched by this, and be assured that I shall pray for all my blog readers this morning.

Archbishop McDonald Resigns...

Breaking news for the Archdiocese of Southwark:

At 11:00 am (GMT) on Friday, 4th December 2009, The Holy Father accepted the resignation of Archbishop Kevin McDonald of Southwark in accordance with Canon 401 §2.

The Archbishop submitted his resignation to the Holy Father having taken account of medical advice.

The Archbishop has had a triple heart bypass and also suffers from severe osteoarthritis. This has already necessitated surgery and the Archbishop envisages further surgery in 2010.

"I feel great sadness at having to relinquish my post as Archbishop of Southwark. Although I have had to contend with illness over the last three years, this appointment has been a great grace. It has been a privilege to lead this great Diocese and I have received a wonderful response to everything I have tried to do. I have also been very appreciative of the prayers of so many people while I have been ill. The Diocese will continue to be very much in my thoughts and prayers in the time ahead."

A Diocesan Administrator will be appointed soon and he will be in charge of the Diocese, until a new Archbishop takes possession of the Diocese.

The Archbishop's resignation letter can be seen here.

I guess PaddyPower will be featuring again as speculation among the UK bloggers is bandied around! In the meantime, one wonders who will be appointed as Administrator.

Heheheheheheh... Blog campaign: His Hermeneuticalness for Archbishop!!

On a more serious note, I am sure everyone will join in offering prayers for Archbishop McDonald's speedy recovery.

Twitch of the mantilla to Fr. John Boyle.

You Can Put Relatives In A Pressure Cooker...

The headline on Luke Coppen's Catholic Herald Blog (It's OK to put your relatives in a pressure cooker, says Catholic ethicist) was certainly an attention-grabber, and I just had to read more.

No, nothing to do with serving up Great-Aunt Bertha for a Sunday casserole. It's all to do with green funerals... and the respect demanded by the Catholic Church for the mortal remains of said Great-Aunt.

It seems that acid baths (as popularised by Crippen and Haigh) are no longer fashionable, but a pressurised soak in alkaline solutions is enough to strip one's bones clean. The bones can then be ground down, and placed in an urn for burial in consecrated ground.

Following last year's tour of the local crematorium, I found the whole thing extremely interesting... though, personally, I still want to be reduced to air pollution, if only to have my revenge for being forced to teach the topic as part of the GCSE syllabus...

Tackiest Nativity Contest...

The Crescat has a contest going for the tackiest Nativity scene. There are some pretty awful examples displayed.

One of the weirdest has to be the ducks... ooops, sorry, apparently it's geese...

Twitch of the mantilla in the direction of the Ironic Catholic.

Monday Madness...

Just for Fr. Steven Fisher's cat...

Chemical Magic...

Today I was demonstrating what happens when you react metals with oxygen. Iron filings in a Bunsen burner create lots of lovely sparks, and copper and zinc filings are even prettier (they make green sparks and blue sparks respectively.) I used magnesium powder too, which makes a brilliant white sparkler effect... and a magnesium oxide "snow" which gave me what looked like a severe case of dandruff.

The "ooohs" and "ahhs" were very gratifying.

Mind you, I then used a glowing splint to test for oxygen in a gas jar. The wooden splint bursting back into flame got the biggest cheer of all.

As I said before, Year 7 are just so easy to impress...

Karen's New Blog...

Karen, the Oceanic Gem, has decided to start up a second blog, concentrating on stuff to do with the Extraordinary Form of Mass - details of saints, catholic heritage and so on. She's including references to her source material, so it'll be a useful resource.

Go and have a look at Bury Me Not on the Lone Prairie when you have a chance.

The Chocolatisation of Advent...

Miss Ellen E. has a very good and thought-provoking post on the chocolatisation of Advent.

By virtue of the fact that I had a German mother (and thus a doting German grandmother living abroad) the Advent calendars of my youth always had chocolate in them. And not in a box below the picture, either: these were proper Advent calendars, with a Nativity scene, lots of glitter, and proper chocolate... with a different shaped chocolate behind each door.

I wasn't brought up as a Catholic, and not even as a Christian - I was baptised at the age of thirteen - but I knew the Christmas story (a rather garbled version, to be sure) from school Nativity plays. I knew what Christmas was actually about, and presents and Santa Claus were an enjoyable result of the birth of Christ.

With the modern tendency to remove any Christian themes from Christmas, most children now know nothing of what Christmas is actually about, and we cannot blame them for wanting to have their favourite cartoon characters on their chocolate calendars. Finding Advent calendars with religious scenes is hard enough - calendars with religious scenes and chocolate are like hens' teeth. It's up to us to tell the manufacturers what we really want, and to keep telling them, until they get the message.