Ever Feel You've Been Cheated?

I saw this over at Fr. Ray's blog (St. Mary Magdalen, Brighton) and realised that, when I had my car blessed, I may have been subjected to a version of "liturgy-lite" !


I think I'll have to go and ask for an upgrade...!

A Positive Press...

Just for once, a press report which I actually find encouraging for us traddy types...

(naturally, it's not British!)
H/T to Fr Gonzales (Overheard in the Sacristy)

Reform Kit

I have previously discussed producing and marketing a DIY Liturgy Kit - complete with candles, tie-dye throw, pebbles, box of tissues and CD of pan-pipe music (whale song version also available.)

It would appear that Et Invisibilium over at Sub Voce feels we need a standby in case the Reform of the Reform should come out any time soon... He presents the Reform Kit - a handy emergency pack which can be kept in every parish sacristy...

Cure for Deadly Disease Found

There is a deadly disease which has apparently been around for about 35 years or so: Litabutinitus. It's been spreading unchecked for far too long, but recently the number of cases has soared.

Luckily, there is now a cure: Lit-Rite. It is available in pill, liquid or aerosol form. Reading through the dosage instructions, I suspect that the liquid form, administered via a holy water stoup, will prove to be the most effective treatment in the UK...

You can read the full diagnostic criteria, indications for drug use, dosage instructions, contraindications and side effects HERE.

H/T to the Curt Jester.

Bits and Blogs

Oh wow! I commented on the fact that several blogs hosted by Wordpress had the really snazzy ability to "see" another webpage by hovering the cursor over the link.

The Dúnadan has obviously been exploring, because he discovered how to do it too... and he was kind enough to put up the information for the rest of us (and gave me a mention in the process!)

The code can be found on the Snap.com website (and they tell you where it goes as well, so you don't need to be afraid of the big bad html beastie that lurks behind every template!!)

I promise you, it's easy as pie... try hovering over some of my links, just to prove it!

Sex Education in Schools

Checking out the Catholic Action UK's site today, I see that SPUC are running a campaign:

Every parent with children at school... needs to find out, urgently, what is happening in the name of 'sex education', 'PHSE', 'SRE' etc. . Teachers usually don't want you to know but don't be fobbed off: you must see the materials they are using, and you may not be able to believe your eyes. You have a right to know, and a duty to protect your children.

They have an Open Letter to Concerned Parents, which starts:

Are your children safe at school?

We are asking this question because we are concerned about what is happening in classrooms during lessons on sex and relationships in both secondary and primary schools. We are concerned that abortifacient contraception and abortions are being aggressively promoted to teenagers in some secondary schools.

Read more HERE. And yes, in case you are wondering, I am the teacher named in the third section - it happened at a previous school I taught in. And now, according to Fr Ray Blake (St. Mary Magdalen's, Brighton) Edinburgh seems to be running a Contraception Service for children.

I Want One of Those!

When I spotted this over at Cally's Kitchen, I was sure it had to be a wind-up. He is, after all, the man who gave us a talking chair and a philosophical cow. But I just couldn't resist exploring a little further...

Sure enough, you can actually buy Innocent III action figures... I quite liked the sales pitch:

Introduce this Pope Innocent III Action Figure to your other figures and watch the spiritual sparks fly! Armed with his formidable power of excommunication and an intimidating scroll inscribed with Latin text, this 6" tall, hard plastic model of the 176th Pope will soon have all your other action figures lining up for confession. Read the back of the illustrated blistercard and you'll find that Pope Innocent III was a good guy in all respects. He was a patron of the arts, cared about orphans, built a hospital and reunified the Papal States! Comes with removable fancy Pope hat.

First time I've heard the Papal tiara described as a fancy Pope hat!

They also make Jesus as a deluxe model - he comes complete with loaves and fishes and a water jar for changing water into wine (though this feature is apparently not guaranteed!)

My Sides Ache...

Looks like Carolina has recovered from her attack of foot-in-mouth disease. First, she silenced a troublesome youngster by telling him how his namesake died a painful martyrs death. As a teacher, I recognise the value of tactics like this... and the kids love gory details (I'm always asked to repeat details about crucifixion or being hanged, drawn and quartered!)

And for a follow-up, she has a pop at modern hymns. Definitely a woman after my own heart. And the cartoon is by Tracy...

I Shouldn't Laugh, But...

It's not fair. Carolina has had a very bad morning. But it made me laugh...

...it is such a relief to realise that I'm not the only person to suffer from terminal foot-in-mouth disease.

Getting All Ex-Sited

Checking out Sitemeter again has demonstrated that Fr. Dwight Longenecker's plug for my blog has caused the hit count to go up fairly smartly.

I have also spotted another blog which has linked back to me: such good judgement deserves a plug in return! So hallo to Terry C at God's Pencil (the blog title is a reference to a quote from Blessed Teresa of Calcutta)

A "Cute" Attack

Sorry about the awful pun in the title... well, no, actually, I'm not sorry, or I'd have changed it... but there's a limited number of times I can head a post with "photos" or "more photos..."

Anyhow, I have received some more snaps of my gorgeous nephew, who is looking particularly cute at the moment. I thought I'd take the time to share...

Off Exploring

No, sorry, you don't get a break from my banal blonde blatherings... I'm not going anywhere! It's more a case of where I've been already (on the blogosphere, natch!

I walked into the Muniment Room (and I must ask Ttony what on earth a muniment is... and why he has two "t"s in his name)

There was a rather moving post about Christmas traditions. I remember when my little sister first declared to the family that she didn't believe in Father Christmas any more... after she had unwrapped all her presents, of course. And yes, this is the same sister that has just presented me with my new nephew!!

Rather Indigestible Fare

Frying Tonight?

I laughed like a hyena when I spotted this one...



H/T to Tracy, The Catholic Knitwit.

A Question of Bilocation...

The Ironic Catholic has a heartfelt question: why can't mothers bilocate? She feels that this particular talent is wasted on celibate saints...

...I can see that she has a point. Read more HERE.

"Traddy" Google !

Heh heh! Look's like Google feels the same way I do about lousy modern hymns...

Pot-Luck Confession

The subject of Confession seems to have hit the Blogosphere with a vengeance in the last day or so. Curt Jester kicked it off (I think... though figuring out exactly where something starts up is difficult, especially if it's a topic which comes up regularly!) Carolina Canonball was upset about getting off lightly with her penances, and then followed it up with a post on Confession-Lite.

Fr. Tim put up a very good (and informative) post about the need for individual Confession. We would expect nothing less from a Professor of Sacramental Theology!! However, although this ought to leave nothing more to say on the subject, I think another laywoman's view of the Sacrament has something to offer...

I was chatting to Fr. Tim on the subject earlier, and I made a remark about it being different when a priest goes to Confession. He disagreed, and said that there were all sorts of priests who had to go to Confession, just as there were all sorts of lay people. I don't think I made my point very well - what I meant to say was that I think that when a penitent announces that he's a priest, the confessor will think more carefully about what he says, and how he says it. I cannot believe that another priest would dare to tell Fr. Tim to confess only one sin, for example... though maybe I'm wrong!

It is very difficult, as an ordinary lay woman, to find a good Confessor. I know it's not just me being fussy: whenever the subject comes up among friends, the first question asked is, "Who do you go to?" closely followed by, "Is he any good?"

Now, we're not stupid. We know that the Sacrament is valid if the priest says the words of absolution (I'm not talking about major abuses like General Absolution, you understand) and so it doesn't "matter" what sort of penance you get and whether the priest is into the Classical Rite or is more in favour of Novus Ordo. But sometimes the experience of going to Confession can be so ghastly that you wonder if it really is worth all the hassle. And if someone is lucky enough to find a good Confessor, they will often move heaven and earth to make sure that they see this priest.

For example, I have been stopped in mid-confession and told that I only needed to focus on one or two sins. I've been in the situation where I needed to ask the priest what my penance was, since none seemed to be forthcoming. I have been asked, in a tone dripping with disapproval, whether I "...always went to Confession this often?" I've even been told that it wasn't good for a person to live alone, and that I should get married! (This was a few years before I had discerned that my vocation was to the single life, you understand)... It was somewhat discouraging, as I couldn't quite figure out how I could comply with that particular instruction. I was sorely tempted to ask whether the same rule applied to priests...

If we want to encourage more people to frequent the Sacrament of Confession, then it has to become less of a pot-luck experience.

Hmmn. Maybe we should start a "Good Confession Guide"! We could award "five stoles" instead of "five stars"... Any thoughts?

Making the Sign of the Cross

Ok, time for a bit of theology (well, I can't keep posting about the weather, even if I am British!)

We had a comment about making the sign with reverence at one of our Confirmation classes, and Father Tim reminded everyone that Our Lady took the trouble to teach St. Bernadette how to make the Sign of the Cross with reverence - and I remember reading that others commented on how beautiful it was to see.

And now Diane at Te Deum Laudamus has put up a post which is well worth a read. Here's a snippet:

WHEN we cross ourselves, let it be with a real sign of the cross. Instead of a small cramped gesture that gives no notion of its meaning, let us make a large unhurried sign, from forehead to breast, from shoulder to shoulder, consciously feeling how it includes the whole of us, our thoughts, our attitudes, our body and soul, every part of us at once. how it consecrates and sanctifies us.

It does so because it is the Sign of the universe and the sign of our redemption. On the cross Christ redeemed mankind. By the cross he sanctifies man to the last shred and fibre of his being. We make the sign of the cross before we pray to collect and compose ourselves and to fix our minds and hearts and wills upon God. We make it when we finish praying in order that we may hold fast the gift we have received from God. In temptations we sign ourselves to be strengthened; in dangers, to be protected. The cross is signed upon us in blessings in order that the fulness of God's life may flow into the soul and fructify and sanctify us wholly.

It's Another No B-rainer...

Hmmn. This one is difficult to figure out. Perhaps you lot out there can help...

Apparently, the South-East of England has had more rainfall in the past two months than in the previous two years. At one stage we had over 50 flood warnings across the UK - with many areas suffering from flooding. December was another wet month throughout England and Wales and the fifth consecutive month with above average rainfall in five of our regions. All regions received average rainfall or above ranging from 100% in our South West Region to 180% in our North West Region.

Despite this, there is still a hosepipe ban in operation...

Another Reason for Latin in the Liturgy?

It would appear that speaking two languages every day helps to delay the onset of dementia. I better learn a few more of those Latin responses !!

H/T to Indolent Server.

Busy Day

Yippee! I have had over 130 hits on the blog today. Yes, I know... 130 is hardly the blogostratosphere... but it's nearly three times what I started with back in May.

Not bad for the rambling thoughts of a ditsy blonde!

Another Blog With Good Taste...

My blog has just been "discovered" by Autumn Rose. She's a convert from the Baptist Church, though I haven't managed to find out how recent... her blog, Christ's Rose, has been up and running since September 2006. I just had a look, and I'm feeling jealous: when you hover the cursor over a link, a picture of the site pops up, which is pretty neat. My blog feels positively underdressed in comparison.

Hmmn. Either Autumn Rose is a computer whizz, or WordPress have some pretty amazing templates...

UPDATE: I just had to swipe the "Proud Catholic" GIF for my sidebar... I think it compliments the "I support the Pope" banner and the Papal flag!

Heaven Help Us!

I can't remember where I first saw this: it is teeth-achingly awful. However, it does illustrate what tends to happen when you let lay people become liturgists and encourage them to be "creative" with the Mass.

Personally I think that this must be an attempt to imitate the beauty of the Classical Rite Mass (think of all the carefully choreographed symbolic gestures of priest, deacons and servers; the vestments (to die for), the sacred vessels, the music etc. etc.) all of which is missing from some of the more sloppy "celebrations" of the Novus Ordo.

Misguided. Sad. When will they realise... we don't need to "invent" a liturgy... it's already been given to us!

Caption Competition

Fr Ray Blake (St Mary Magdalen's, Brighton) had this wonderful picture up and invited everyone to take part in a caption competition. I liked the picture so much that I'm afraid I swiped it for my own blog... but I am completely out of witty captions.

Shameless Self-Publicity

I will no doubt have to go to Confession after this post... I have been given a mention on Fr Dwight Longenecker's excellent blog, Standing on My Head. Admittedly, he also mentioned a few other British Bloggers, but I shall magnanimously forgive this lapse of judgement as the other blogs mentioned are rather good ones.

I particularly enjoyed reading that my "great" blog has "...Plenty of pithy comment, cheerful good humor and British irony." I'll even go so far as to overlook the fact that Americans can't spell "humour"...
;-)

Fr Dwight's take on a typical Auntie Joanna entry is also very entertaining!

Progress... (Of Sorts)

Ha! Further to my New Year's Resolution, I can report that I have made a little progress...

I've finally cracked the Confiteor! Yippee!

Of course, just to make it more challenging, I shall now have to learn the Classical Rite version too...

*bangs head on table amid cries of hysterical laughter*

Here We Go Again...

I saw the headline on the front page of the Daily Mail on my way back from Benediction, and then read about it online (H/T to Aaron at Indolent Server)

I was wondering at the beginning of Exposition, as Fr Tim asked us to pray for the freedom to worship as Catholics in our country, whether it might do us some good to be under such blatant persecution. People will then see it for what it is, and might be provoked into standing up for their beliefs.

A school provoked fury last night by ordering a devout Catholic schoolgirl to remove her cross necklace because it posed a health and safety risk.

Teachers demanded Samantha Devine remove her chain and tiny crucifix despite allowing Muslim and Sikh pupils to wear symbols of their religion.

Her family have vowed to fight the decision "all the way" claiming it discriminates against Christians.

The case mirrors the row which engulfed British Airways and forced the airline into an embarrassing climbdown after it threatened to sack an employee who insisted on wearing her cross at work.

In the latest clash, 13-year-old Samantha was left in tears after her form teacher told her she must remove her tiny half-inch crucifix and chain.

But her furious family yesterday pointed out the school - Robert Napier in Gillingham, Kent - allows Muslim pupils to wear headscarves and Sikh students to come to lessons with turbans and bangles.

Samantha even claims staff routinely fail to crack down on youngsters wearing non-religious jewellery, including large necklaces and earrings.

Her parents are concerned she is being singled out because she is a Christian. The youngster last night vowed to continue wearing her necklace to school - even if it means being expelled.

Her stand now threatens to spark similar confrontations in schools up and down the country.

Read the full story HERE.

Wishful Thinking?

The following little snippet might get some of you a little exercised... it's courtesy of Fr L.W. Gonzales (Overheard in the Sacristy)



Now, before you get carried away, Fr Gonzales had the piece labelled "humor" which I guess is American for a leg-pull...

It made me do a double-take though!!

The Shipping Forecast

I keep meaning to re-tune my radio away from the BBC's Radio 4. However, at night, it switches automatically to the World Service - difficult to imagine a radio station closing down for the night in these days of 24-hour shopping and television! I grew up hearing the World Service in the middle of the night as my mother was a real night owl, and she would listen to the plays (they still did those back then, rather than the continual re-hashing of "news" which isn't really.)

Anyway, there's something comforting about having the radio mutter quietly in the background - reassurance that I haven't overslept, mostly - so I find the habit hard to break. Maybe I'll give it up for Lent.

One of the last things I hear, just before Radio 4 closes, is the Shipping Forecast. I have listened to it for years. There is something very cozy about being under the duvet while hearing that there's a "Southwesterly 6 or 7, becoming cyclonic 7 to severe gale 9 for a time. Rain at times. Moderate." It's like another language. Viking, North Utsire, South Utsire... Dogger, Fisher, German Bight, (that always drew houls of laughter round the dinner table - my mother is German, and she'd always mime to that one!) Humber, Thames, Dover, Wight...

Wednesday night we had lots of high winds. I'd often heard "storm 10" mentioned, but it was the first time that I heard "violent storm 11" used. And the announcer ended the Radio 4 broadcast with a special mention of those out at sea... another first.

So I wondered what came after 11: I knew the Beaufort Wind Scale went up to 12, but was puzzled as to what description would be added... super-violent? ...extremely violent? ...very violent?

I finally decided to have a look on Google: and it's fascinating to see where all those sea areas actually are... I had no idea Trafalgar was all the way down there!! If you're interested, you can have a look for yourself, by clicking HERE.

(BTW, 12 is actually hurricane force!)

The Power of the Blog

Well, well, well... if anyone needed a demonstration of how powerful "all this blog stuff" actually is, we have definitive proof!

As well as being an excellent way to get news out among ordinary Catholics, bypassing media spin, it seems that getting your face posted on various blogs can open doors.

Fr Zuhlsdorf (What Does The Prayer Really Say?) recognised the far-from-elusive non-blogging Fr Whinder and Fr Schofield (Roman Miscellany) on their perambulations around the Eternal City, and invited them in for a drink.

Blog Power indeed!

Despite the attraction of instant celebrity, I shall refrain from scaring the horses by putting up anything other than the back of my head (neatly shielded by a mantilla!)

Catholic Alphabet Meme... With a Caveman Twist !

There is a Catholic Alphabet Meme doing the rounds. No-one tagged me (*hangs head in shame*) but that has never stopped me before. However, I found it a little too saccharine-sweet for my personal taste (and filling out 26 items, one of which had to begin with X, was a little too much like hard work!)

And it would appear that I am not alone... The Catholic Caveman has given the meme his very personal slant... particularly his proposal for a "musical" accompaniment to "On Eagle's Wings."

(BTW, if I got the apostrophe in the wrong place - something which really gets up my nose - it's because I am assuming there is only one eagle!)

Creating Creative Liturgies

It would appear that the Prayer of the Frog and the Pub Mass are not the only creative liturgies out there...

Auntie Joanna revisited a liturgy she created... or, to be more accurate, a liturgy she reported as happening over in Oz. She used lots of touchy-feely jargon and bemoaned the fact that the Church was oppressing women and objecting to adultery...

...before you go crazy, yes she was "extracting the Michael" but the Women's Focus Group she sent the report to fell for it, hook, line and sinker. I wish she would put up a copy of the original report... it sounds priceless!

You can read more HERE.

More Cell Phones...

Following my previous post on mobile phones, I received a comment from Gildas at Orthfully Catholic which literally made me cry with laughter. He reports...

...one incident in which the phone went off during the homily. The priest went down and took the call, saying "sorry, your friend can't talk to you at the moment: he's in Church. By the way, why aren't you here?"

And here's another Cell Phone Karma video to enjoy:



H/T to Orthometer.

Consecration to the Immaculate Heart of Mary

A friend of mine sent me the following prayer intention by email... I'm sure she won't mind it going out on the blog.

It is vital that you continue to pray, do penance and offer your Communions, for the intention that the Bishops of England and Wales consent to re-consecrate our country to the Sorrowful and Immaculate Heart of Mary, following the example of the act carried out by the US Bishops on 11th Nov 2006.

The position now is that Mgr Keith Barltrop of CASE (Catholic Agency for the Support of Evangelisation), who has excellent relations with all our Bishops, has drafted a letter, which it is proposed will be sent out jointly with Mgr Graham Leonard, the former Anglican Bishop of London, to the Apostolic Nuncio, Cardinal Murphy-O'Connor and Archbishop Nichols of Birmingham.

Mgr. Barlthrop is awaiting the response of Mgr. Leonard, who has agreed in principle - hence the urgency of offering prayer, penance and the sacrifices involved in fulfilling the ordinary duties of one's state, for this intention.

I am sure I do not need to tell you how greatly we need the intercession of Mary Immaculate in our country, to raise up the Church and avert present evils.

If the three prelates then agree to make the consecration, the intention is that all other Bishops will be invited to join in the act by sending in a signed copy of the prayer to be recited in the act, which will be placed on the altar, as was done in the USA.

May hearts everywhere be raised up in prayer to the merciful Lord for this intention.

Remember to Switch Off, People !

I have to admit to being paranoid about leaving my mobile phone switched on, and it starting to ring in church. To compensate, I often leave my phone off for days on end... or at the very least, leave it on silent... or even at home (slightly excessive, and rather negating the point of having a mobile in the first place!)

So whenever a phone goes off in church, my first thought is, "Ha ! Thank God it's not mine..." closely followed by, "...at least I hope not!" Everyone makes mistakes. The irritation sets in when someone starts to answer the phone in church...

So this little snippet from Orthometer made me laugh out loud...

Health Alert: Yoga Causes Brain Damage.

I nearly crashed the car this morning... I was listening to an item on Radio 4, concerning yoga as an alternative treatment for infertility.

The phrase that really made me wonder which planet some people inhabit? "Yoga helps to get the blood right down into the pelvis..."

Hellooo! Earth calling! I think you'll find blood gets down there anyway, on account of it, like, circulates...

...though on reflection, maybe teaching yoga deprives the brain of oxygen...

Cute Bunny Rabbits... NOT !

Personally, I dislike rabbits. Watership Down was not a good reading experience. And I think the cute image is vastly overdone... I blame Beatrix Potter for a lot of it. In my experience, rabbits poo a lot and they smell vile. They also have really sharp teeth. And they are evil. If you have to have rodents, rats are much nicer.

Dadwithnoisykids over at Scorpion Stalking Duck illustrates my point. Rabbit versus rattlesnake, and the snake loses...

Give Us Back Our Holyday Heritage !

The Bishops of England and Wales say that they are very keen on consultation with the faithful. So much so that they want to have lots of cozy little chats with parish groups to find out how the Church should "progress." By which they seem to mean that they "need" to plan for a Church with fewer parishes and fewer priests... and more "caring, sharing" Communion Services.

So, having heard how keen they are on consultation, it was a trifle irritating to find that these same Bishops, without so much as a by-your-leave - let alone consultation, have abolished most of the Holydays of Obligation. Oh sorry, no... not abolished exactly, just transferred them to the nearest Sunday to make life easier for the faithful who lead such busy lives. However, since Sundays (last time I looked) are days of Obligation anyway, the extra Holydays have effectively been abolished, so let's not pretty it up with fancy words.

It is even more annoying to read on blogs overseas praising the Cardinal Archbishop of Westminster for having written a Pastoral Letter encouraging the faithful to take part in more traditional Catholic devotions, like Benediction and the Rosary... (See this post by The Hon. Treasurer at the Recusant Cricket Club for a good examination of his message.) It seems to have escaped the notice of the Cardinal that the sort of person who would "find the time" for such Catholic devotions is the sort of person who would jolly well make sure that they found the time to attend the Holy Sacrifice of the Mass on a Holyday of Obligation, and who rejoiced in the marking of such major Feasts in the same way that Catholics through the ages have done...

...Maybe I'm being overly cynical, but has anyone else noticed that such devotions as the Rosary and the Stations of the Cross and so on don't actually need the presence of a priest...?

Virus Alert - Send to Everyone... NOT !

Some people put messages at the ends of their emails reminding everyone not to bother forwarding all the virus scare emails... which are basically more effective than any actual virus!

However, I really couldn't resist this virus alert. In my defence, I'm not sending it to anyone... and it is by Weird Al (and very funny!)

Enjoy!


H/T to Orthometer.

Ministry Pins

I've spotted a genuinely new blog... according to the Blogger Profile, Et Invisibilium at Sub Voce has been blogging since January 2007.

He/she/it/they (hey, I seem to have gone all pc... HELP!) have an amusing post on different "ministry pins" which are being issued to support various groups... a bit like all the different colour wristbands and ribbons which seem to be popping up everywhere.

Check them out HERE.

It's All or Nothing

An excellent post reflecting on how we often accept "some" unpleasant stuff (sex scenes in films, etc.) because the rest is ok... Laura points out that we have a real duty to avoid occasions of sin, and uses a brilliant Poopy Brownie Analogy.

Blogroll Updates

I've been updating my blogrolls. Gosh, I love broadband...

...my computer is pretty neat too!

Your Horoscope for Today

Exploring the Blogosphere, I happened upon this very funny video (scenes from Lord of the Rings) to accompany Wierd Al Yankovic's song "That's Your Horoscope for Today"



H/T to Fr Erik Richtsteig at Orthometer.

New Source of Stem Cells?

I heard the following report on the BBC World Service late last night, and have since spotted it over at The Cafeteria is Closed...

There is a possibility that stem cells can be obtained from amniotic fluid, without harm to either mother or baby.

Hmmn. If it's true, then that sounds very encouraging. But I worry that the fluid will be obtained from the amniotic sacs around aborted foetuses, and because everyone's heard that "it's alright, it's not foetal tissue" then distinctions wil be blurred and people won't differentiate. And abortions will be carried out as a way of harvesting the amniotic fluid...

Yes, it sounds crazy, but I used to work as a neuropsychopharmacologist, doing foetal tissue transplants (in rats) and I've read some of the research which was done back then. It's horrific, and some people have the view that scientific research shouldn't be limited by religious "scruples" because we have to make progress...

I wrote an article on this stuff a few years after my return to the Church, and it was published in Faith Magazine (July 1996 - unfortunately not available for download, but I might be able to dig it out if anyone is interested.) Believe me, things have gotten much worse...

UPDATE: I found a copy of my article in the EWTN archives on Pro-Life issues (No. 92). You can link to it HERE.

The Wise Man Speaks...

Hee hee! Histor the Wise has put up his own thoughts on inclusive language. I particularly enjoyed his "clippy" caption. But Napoleon as a PC fanatic? Not tonight, Josephine!

Scrumptious !

Well, I finally managed to get to see my new nephew (admittedly I did get lost en route!) and I was allowed to give him a cuddle or two. This was, I suspect, only allowed because my sister wanted a chance to eat her lunch.

Maybe I am biased, but I think he is simply gorgeous. Looking at him, just a week old, and my inner response was "Wow, how can you NOT believe in God seeing the wonder of a tiny human creation!"

So, photo time again. Yes, I'm showing off !!

I took this one on my mobile phone before his mum woke him up for a feed:



...and this one was taken (again on the phone) by my brother-in-law - I'm holding the baby (and that's about as much of me as I want to see in a photo!!)



Finally, this one was taken to give an idea of how tiny he still is: I'm cradling his head in one hand (check out the thumb!)

Further Thoughts on Inclusive Language

I liked Fr Tim's cartoon, but was tempted to see what else was out there as a way of making my thoughts and feelings known...

Fame at Last...

Yippee. My rant about PC Christmas Carols made it onto Fr Tim's blog.

This means that:
1) I should get lots and lots and LOTS more hits on my blog (very good for the ego) and
2) Fr Tim might actually get round to burning the hymn books, like he promised. After all, what's a little extra carbon dioxide among friends??! Global warming is not necessarily a bad thing... It'll help keep down heating bills for the elderly.

I particularly enjoyed the graphic representation of a typical female response to patronising PC nerds (oops, sorry, caring, sharing, sensitive new-man types!)

It's a Wind-Up... Ooops, Whinder-Up!

I'm sure that the only reason Fr Nicholas has put up the pictures of Fr Richard is as an excuse to rub our noses in the fact that the two of them are jetting off to the Eternal City. Apparently Fr Nicholas does not anticipate doing any blogging. He has obviously not heard of Internet Cafés...

...and Fathers, while you're out there, ahem, there's the little matter of postcards... (Don't worry, Fr Nicholas: Fr Richard will explain all! Otherwise I shall be having words when he gets back!)

...Papal Rosaries are also pretty neat!

;-)

Mea culpa, mea culpa

See, I'm learning already!

...oh, ok, I'll 'fess up... I already knew that bit.

I've been a little slow in following up blog links, and have tended to stick to a few that I am familiar with. Well, time to get a bit more adventurous...

I'd seen Andrew's Profile Picture a few times in various com-boxes, but have, to my shame, only just had a peek at his blog. And what a treat was in store: he really likes his Papal Photos, does Andrew. And I especially enjoyed the captions....

Check him out at Unam Sanctam.

Couldn't Resist...

There's a good article at The Hermeneutic of Continuity on the Enneagram. And then, when browsing through Ironic Catholic's blog, I came upon a site which makes fortune cookies.

My Fortune Cookie told me: People are beginning to notice you. Try dressing before you leave the house. Get a cookie from Miss Fortune

"New" Year's Resolution

I have a bad habit of making lots of New Year's resolutions (mostly dietary) and then failing to keep them... This means that the year starts on a low note, because I promise to be good, and fail miserably!

Last year I decided not to make any such resolutions, and when I failed to keep any of the resolutions I would normally have made, I felt quite good about it. Almost vindicated, you might say...

This year I'm afraid that I've made a resolution. However, it is nothing to do with diets. Instead, I have decided that I am going to try very, very hard to learn the Latin responses for the Mass. I've made some slight progress over the 14 years I've been back in the fold... when I first came back, the only Latin Mass response I knew was the Kyrie... the rest was all Greek to me...

*dodges tomatoes*

I was therefore very encouraged to find the following LINK for a Latin-English dictionary, courtesy of David at The Fullness of Faith. Unfortunately, on looking at the instructions and explanation of how the dictionary is set up, I decided it was probably easier just to learn the language...

;-)

Grrrr !

I love to sing. I've got quite a good voice (not trained, nothing special, but I'm loud and I can hold a tune) and so I really like this time of year when I can belt out all the favourite Christmas Carols which I learned at school (back then, *peer through swirling mists of time,* Christmas was still called Christmas, and state Primary Schools put on Nativity Plays, and everyone sang Carols whether they believed in God or not!)

Epiphany is a particularly good time to sing Carols... we get all the references to the Magi as well as the earlier shepherds and angels stuff...

Well, not any more. I went to Mass this evening as tomorrow morning I'm off to see my sister and brother-in-law (well, truth be told, I'm actually more interested in my new nephew!) and although I intend to leave in plenty of time to attend evening Mass, given what happened last Monday, I'm taking no chances...

We only sang four carols, but every one had been mucked about with by the politically-correct brigade. At other times of the year it's not so noticeable (partly because I don't know the hymns so well... I've only been singing them since my return to the fold, as it were!) but this really has got me steamed up. "Humankind" is just downright clumsy as well as needing an extra syllable. But when whole sentences are ploughed up for the sake of not offending "wimmin," I get pretty offended. The alternatives offered are clunky, change the meanings, muck around with the rhymes and generally grate on the nerves...

I fought back... I sang what I remembered... Loudly!

Penance Over!

Yes, I am delighted to be able to report that my car is safely back on the road. I have had to suffer the vagaries of public transport for the week, and am heartily pleased to be able to put my recently acquired Oyster Card into storage.

(For anyone who doesn't know, an Oyster Card is the latest system for getting people to buy their travelcards, bus tickets and what-have-you up front, and not on the bus itself! Fair enough, but trying to find somewhere that sold the cards themselves was an experience in itself... and I had to buy the card before I could actually put any money for my bus fares on it!!)

The people at the garage considered me fortunate indeed... they said that such a complete collapse of the wheel bearing was rare, but that it was pretty amazing that the wheel hadn't come off since I was whizzing round the M25 at the time...

...'Nuff said! I promptly drove round to the church, and fortuitously caught Fr Tim just as he was about to jump into his car. He blessed mine (paying particular attention to the newly-repaired bit!) and I then went in to the church to light a candle and say a fervent prayer of thanksgiving. And I shall have the luxury of driving to Mass tomorrow morning!

More on Miles Jesu and Continuity

Mark asked in the Com-Box for some more information on Miles Jesu, and in particular the Continuity Movement. Ever happy to oblige my faithful readers (or possibly the one reader who logs on to my blog 108 times a day) I'm including a couple of links:

http://www.mjcontinuity.com will get you to the Homepage which has links to MJ International (this might interest anyone outside the UK) and then here is a link if you want to cut to the chase and go straight to the UK page (which also has details about the concert) http://www.mjcontinuity.com/UK/index.html

And here is a rather good photo of the five members here in England (and yes, that is Fr Tim Finigan in the middle!)

(BTW, I took the photo, but on someone else's camera, when they came to Our Lady of the Rosary Parish for the Dowry of Mary week we had in Advent)

Blog Statistics (Not That I'm Boasting...)

I am NOT a nerd...

...however, I am rather keen on checking my blog statistics. I am nowhere near the big-time league inhabited by such Great Bloggers as Hermeneutic of Continuity, American Papist, Cafeteria is Closed, Curt Jester or Lair of the Catholic Cavemen...

...but, I am delighted to note that my daily average visitor number is now 98... and lately I've had over 100 hits a day! Not bad for blonde musings on nothing much in particular!!

Spiritual Direction

Well, I had a session of Spiritual Direction this evening...

When friends hear that I have a Spiritual Director, they always seem fascinated by the thought, and have lots of questions, so I thought I'd put down a few thoughts on the subject...

There is nothing "nice" about SD... it is amazingly good and helpful for one's spiritual life, and I think it's extremely necessary for anyone who is serious about progressing in their prayer life, but I can't say that I enjoy it, exactly!

In fact, although I am the one who initiates each session by requesting a meeting, I always find myself hoping that it won't happen very soon (I am always disappointed in this) and then I approach the meeting itself with some trepidation.

I guess that it's a bit similar to visiting the dentist - although I don't quite know how my Director would react to getting bitten...

This evening I had the very disconcerting experience of hearing my SD suddenly say, "Hang on, I need to check Tanqueray!" (I may have got the spelling wrong) and then he disappeared. It sounded serious, and I half expected him to return with bell, book and candle... However, it transpires that I haven't merited excommunication, but I have lots of advice on what I should be doing... including reading a book of St. Alphonsus Liguori's sermons... most of which appear to be concerned with Hell... (the other three Last Things get a mention too, but Hell predominates!)

Seriously though, if you are trying to discern your vocation or to make progress in the spiritual life, I would recommend that you find a good SD. He (it can be a 'she', but I personally prefer a priest) should be someone you find sympatico but don't expect SD sessions to be a friendly chat. They are meant to be detailed examinations of your life, and can be quite uncomfortable... (but maybe that's just me!!) And it may take many years to find a Director you are happy with.

After a session, I feel as if I've had a thorough "going-over" with a spiritual brillo pad (that's a brand of steel wool scourer for any of our Transatlantic Cousins) and had my insides turned outside for good measure. It sounds awful, but it really does help you to see your life clearly. How often you need to meet depends on your particular circumstances: I find an average of once every six weeks about right. Your SD needn't be your Confessor, but you can't hold back anything - your SD needs to know where your particular difficulties lie in order to help you overcome them.

Finally, and it sounds pretty much like stating the obvious, you have to be prepared to listen to your SD and take his advice. It may not be pleasant, and it might not be easy, but making the decision to be obedient to your Director is, in my humble opinion, absolutely vital.

Those are just some of my thoughts... I'd be interested to hear from any priests out there who have experience of SD from "the other side"! You know where the Com-Box is...

Miles Jesu

Brad, one of the chaps from Miles Jesu (the one who took the photo of my nails) asked me to let everyone know of an evening concert being held to raise funds for the Miles Jesu-Continuity Movement.

It's in Westminster Cathedral Hall, Sunday 14th January, at 6pm. Ruth Rogers and Matthew Schellhorn will be playing a variety of pieces for violin and piano. Adults £12, Students (and children under 16) £8, for tickets call 0208 764 0341 or email continuity@fsmail.net

Miles Jesu has been here in England for almost ten years. For the last few years the Community has rented a house in Norbury, near Croydon. They are now saving funds to buy a permanent residence in England.

Please, support them if you can: they do some amazing work in their apostolate.

The Ubiquitous Fr. Whinder

Fr. Richard Whinder has ended up with his picture on yet another blog. It's a rather good picture, taken during his sojourn in Canterbury and can be seen on David's blog, The Fullness of Faith.

Incidentally, it's in the middle of David's conversion story, which makes for a pretty good read too!

NoisyKid on the Blog

It would appear that one of the noisykids has his very own blog... The Son of DadWithNoisyKids (Scorpion Stalking Duck) has his blog at Est Puzzlementum, where he posts as Histor the Wise.

Histor the Wise decided to make a comment on my blog... and I am totally unable to resist following up such a promising Blog profile... Actually he wasn't that wise, because he referred to me as "Mrs. McLernon" which indicates that he hasn't read my profile... however, I shall be magnanimous and forgive him, as he is obviously wise enough to read some of my blog!

I suppose I ought to apologise for the awful pun in the title... but hey, I found it amusing!

The Joys of Public Transport

Today I had the dubious pleasure of using public transport to get to morning Mass.

My first shock was that the fares had escalated: not being a regular user, I hadn't bothered to get a travelcard... and so I enraged the first bus driver by having to root around for the remainder of my fare. I didn't bother to offer him the £20 note I had, as I knew that would earn me a sardonic laugh (at best) or £18 in twenty pence pieces!

So I popped into a chemist's shop which was by the stop for my second bus. I knew they wouldn't just "give" me change, so I picked up some dental floss (I need some anyway) and went over to the counter. It was at this point that my morning started to get surreal.

The assistant told me that it was her first day, and she didn't have a till number yet, so she had to get someone else to serve me. And then the second assistant explained that the till wouldn't open, because they didn't know how to activate it... apparently the shop had opened only the day before, and someone had demonstrated how to close up the till at the end of the day, but no-one had thought to ask what to do at the beginning. So they needed to ring someone at Head Office...

They were all terribly embarassed and apologetic, and I felt that, if I just turned round and walked out, they would feel that they had "lost" a customer... added to which, I really needed some change... and I wanted to know what would happen next...

Bless them! They got given some instructions over the phone (which were duly written down) and then the chap in charge had to go upstairs to activate something (it's all computerised) and then they could start up the till...

...the till drawer finally opened... but there wasn't anything in it! That had to be obtained from the safe!!

I could see the bus stop, and there was no sign of the bus I needed, so I just grinned!! Anyway, I finally managed to buy my dental floss, and got some change. I then went to wait for the bus. Which didn't arrive for another half hour...

I managed to get to Mass on time, but only just. The return journey was of a similar length (without the chemist shop interlude) but one of the bus drivers thought he was in training for Brands Hatch and kept accelerating off at high speed, only to screech to a halt at the next bus stop about two minutes later. There was also a diversion because of roadworks, which meant that the bus driver had to negotiate "proper" speedbumps (the type that go across the whole road.) Needless to say, he didn't bother slowing down, and so the bus see-sawed in quite an impressive fashion!

A journey which usually takes me 10-15 minutes by car took an hour and a half (this was the return journey, so not including my chemist shop experience) Cars may contribute to pollution and global warming, but I think that I will continue to make frequent use of mine for the forseeable future!

Not the Best Way to Start the New Year

What a morning I've had!

I rang my favourite garage to find out if they could fix a collapsed wheel bearing. I was told this would be possible, but they didn't have the required part, which came only from Hyundai. As there is a Hyundai garage in Blackfen, I rang to ask if they could do the job. They had the part, but couldn't do the job today. Possibly, maybe, tomorrow. If I was lucky.

I decided to mull it over and called a cab to take me to Mass. Then a happy thought occurred: I could go and buy the part I needed from the Hyundai garage (just round the corner from the church) and bring it to my favourite garage. Problem solved...

I bought the parts (there were three of them) and went home. Then I rang the breakdown service I am with. They were happy to come and get me and the car and take it to the garage. I had to wait for a bit, but that was ok...

...but (there's always a "but") it transpires that the bearing had really collapsed. And welded itself onto some widget or other. And in this model car it has to be a complete axle doobrey unit thingy (you may have gathered that I'm not really au fait with the terminology!) and this is only available from Hyundai...

...and it won't be available until Thursday...

Aaaaaarghhhh ! I hope this isn't an indication of how 2007 is going to progress...

First Pictures of my Nephew

I didn't manage to get to see him yesterday, and I don't know if I'll get to see him today (long story... more later) but the proud father has sent the following photos.

My sister and her baby are due home today, so obviously all is well. Luckily the baby doesn't resemble his maternal aunt!!

What the Future Doesn't Hold for 2007

Ever wondered what would happen if you woke up in a parallel universe? Well, I think it's a safe bet to say that, even in a parallel universe, hell would have frozen over before you'd see any of this lot happening...

Check it out HERE. (I think Fr Tim has been hallucinating... too much incense!)

Famous Last Words...

I had planned to go to visit my sister (and see my new nephew) this afternoon. The drive would have taken a couple of hours, but I was looking forward to the journey. Then my car started to make an odd screechy sound. Fr Tim (of Hermeneutic of Continuity fame) heard it, and assured me that noises "like that" were only minor problems.

So, off I went, reassured. Ha! Fr Tim may be an excellent Seminary professor, Parish Priest, Blogger par excellence, and what have you, but he knows nothing about cars...

I got as far as Junction 9 on the M25 when the screeching noise started up, much louder, and then the car "wobbled." I'm not a brilliant driver, but I knew that I hadn't caused that wobble, and I didn't like it one little bit. So I pulled over on to the hard shoulder, and rang the breakdown services. Being a woman travelling alone has its advantages: I was promised priority treatment.

The next task was getting out of the car. I remembered reading that one should always leave one's vehicle and move well clear. Easier said than done, with massive lorries thundering past! Luckily, I also remembered that one should exit via the passenger door...

...Now, as anyone who has met me will readily acknowledge, I am not exactly svelte. Far from it. Actually I am probably three svelte people rolled into one. To complicate matters, I have a dodgy left knee from a road accident (and subsequent surgery) in my long-distant youth, and a dodgy right ankle from when I broke it falling down the sacristy steps 18 months ago (made slightly worse by the car crash I had a year ago.) Getting from the driver's side over to the passenger seat was, well, interesting... it would probably make a good yoga position from which to recite the prayer of the frog. At one point, both feet were on the dashboard... you don't want to know where the rest of me had got to!

That athletic feat achieved, I sat down to wait for the breakdown truck, and whiled away the time by reciting the rosary.

A Highway Patrol vehicle pulled up first, and checked to see that I was alright, and then the breakdown truck arrived. It was decided to take me off the motorway so that the car could be examined properly, and hopefully fixed...

No such luck. On closer examination it transpired that a rear wheel bearing had collapsed. Although it is a relatively straightforward job to put right, I had "chosen" to break down on a Bank Holiday: all the garages were closed, and the breakdown chap didn't have the relevant part in stock, so he couldn't even take me to his garage as a favour.

He loaded the car onto the truck and drove me home. I now have to pray that my local garage has the relevant bit, and that they can fit me in.

On reflection, I'm beginning to think that maybe I should stay off the roads at Christmas...

So, I haven't yet seen my nephew. My brother-in-law has promised to send me photos when he gets home this evening. I shall post them as soon as he does.