A Restaurant Review To Cherish...

...but the chef will not be the one doing the cherishing...

Seriously, this is one of the wittiest restaurant reviews I have ever read. I'm almost tempted to book a table, just to see if it is really as bad as Jay Rayner makes out...

"A little over a century ago my Jewish forebears fled that part of Eastern Europe then known as the Pale of Settlement. Having eaten at Divo, described as London's first luxury Ukrainian restaurant, I now know why. It was to escape the cooking. There are many words I could use to describe the food served here, but this is a family newspaper and none of them should be available before the watershed..."

Mantilla-twitch to the Closed Cafeteria.

How To Heckle... Lesson 1

This made me smile: rarely has a speaker been heckled so politely, or with such panache...


Twitch of the mantilla in the direction of Ttony at The Muniment Room

Our Lady Of The Rosary School Bazaar

Our Primary School is very badly funded by the Education Authority, probably because it does so well... it doesn't get all the extra financial help which struggling schools seem to qualify for. So they hold regular fund-raising events (like the School Fete) which parishioners are warmly encouraged (read three-line-whip from the pulpit last Sunday!) to attend...

I don't have any children of my own, and I see quite a lot of children (older ones, but still children) during my working week, but the school and parish are closely linked, so I try to go along. Invariably, I end up having a whale of a time chatting to friends.

The Parish UCM were out in force: they had home-made plum jam, marmalade, and various cakes (I succumbed to a delicious-looking cherry cake and a pot of jam) and they were running a raffle for the christmas cake - the Nativity Scene was hand-painted in food colouring!!!

Tea was served by this intrepid team... they were also serving mulled wine, but kept remarkably quiet about its availability, positioning themselves carefully so as to conceal the tipple from view...



There was a stall with children's toys on it. I did my usual trick of walking right past it, thinking "no children, doesn't apply!" when a friend pointed out that I have an eleven-month-old nephew, and it's worth getting into the habit of checking such things out. I ended up buying a bag of wooden track and train-type vehicles (recommended by a friend who has several children - she seemed to know what the stuff was called as well...)

This pair were selling videos... I thought there wouldn't be much call for them these days, but the mother assured me that videos were much more child-friendly than DVDs (which scratch easily.) I later spotted a friend of mine (a primary school teacher) stocking up on various videos. The little girl in the photo had only started at the school a few days before, so it must have seemed like they were throwing a welcome party just for her; it was great to see her mother getting stuck right in...

Of course, a Christmas Bazaar wouldn't feel like a proper Christmas Bazaar without Santa's Grotto. Here, Santa's little helper is keeping order, probably for 'elf and safety purposes. I was allowed to sneak in to Santa's Grotto to take a couple of unofficial photos for the blog...


All in all, a great time was had by everyone. Now, if you'll excuse me, there's a large slice of cherry cake with my name on it...

One In The Eye For The PC Crowd...

Apparently, Pope Benedict XIII took up smoking at the tender age of 75. I couldn't resist putting up the following portrait of him...


Mantilla twitched in Fr. Ray's direction... but I take full responsibility for the slight addition!

Time Out !

After yesterday's rant, I needed a little light relief...

First, over at the Ironic Catholic, an oldie-but-goodie:


Secondly, courtesy of the Gem of the Ocean:



And finally, a friend sent me this by email...

A young lad was visiting a church for the first time, checking all the announcements and posters along the walls.

When he came to a group of pictures of men in uniform, he asked a nearby usher, "Who are all those men in the pictures?"

The usher replied, "Why, those are our boys who died in the service".

Horrified, the youngster asked, "Was that the morning service or the evening service?"

Enjoy your weekend!

Expletives Deleted!

I just cannot believe that it has come to this! Well, actually, I do believe it... it is symptomatic of all that is going horribly wrong in modern, secular Britain. What else can you expect from a country whose Prime Minister declared that it was really great that the UK was at the forefront of embryo research involving monstrosities like hybrids; stuff, incidentally, that the rest of Europe wouldn't touch with a ten-foot barge-pole?

But this really is "extracting the urine"*...

Hilary White has reported on LifeSite News that:

"A British physician may be forced out of a job for helping women decide against abortion. Dr. Tammie Downes is under investigation for professional misconduct after she said in an interview with the Daily Mail that she had been instrumental in helping many women patients decide to continue to carry their children to term.

"In the Daily Mail interview, Dr. Downes said she asked women in crisis pregnancies, “What would have to change to make you see things differently? What would help you to see this baby as good news and not bad news?”

"For defying the abortion-ideology that prevails in the British medical establishment, Dr. Downes is under investigation by the General Medical Council and may lose the right to practice medicine. The Guardian newspaper reported that the investigation was begun after a complaint by “a practising doctor involved in the pro-choice movement” accused Downes of breaching the GMC's Good Medical Practice Guidelines."

Oh, right... it's ok for the pro-abortion lot to advertise their services to the extent of campaigning to have the abortion pill sold over the counter in supermarket pharmacies and peddled to 13-year-old girls by the school nurse, but doctors are not allowed to give the opposite point of view if it's one that they actually happen to believe in it... so all the doctors signing abortion certificates are really pro-life themselves...

...yeah, right. And the moon is made of green cheese.

Mantilla-twitch to Fr. Blake.

* This expression, a favourite of mine, can be translated loosely as "taking the Mick"... the exact translation is much more expressive, but involves a four-letter word!

A Call To Arms...

The Hermeneutic of Continuity has thrown down the gauntlet: someone must know someone who knows Mel Gibson... actually, I thought there were six degrees of separation between every person on the planet, but the Catholic Blogosphere is such a cosy, intimate group...

So, the idea is to persuade Mr. Gibson that he really, really wants to make another stonking good movie, this time on the life of St. Edmund Campion. It would be the perfect answer to the Catholic-bashing tosh which is being promulgated as "history" in the films Elizabeth and The Golden Age.

And Fr. Tim has asked all bloggers in sympathy with this campaign to get the word out - "Unleash the power of the Blog."

Oh, and if anyone out there does happen to know Mel Gibson, I'm available for lunch...

Parents' Evening...

I do like Parents' Evenings. They are very hard work, and, on top of a full teaching day, they can be totally exhausting, but it is really great to be able to meet the parents of some of the children we teach. It also has the advantage of demonstrating to the parents that the "mean ogre who always picks on innocent little me for no reason at all" is actually human and quite approachable.

My opening salvo is nearly always effective here: "So, Johnny, what do you think I'm going to say to your parents?"

Little Johnny has nearly always been brought up by parents to tell the truth. So he very obligingly confesses to whichever misdemeanours you usually reproach him with in class...

...which are henceforth impossible to deny as something done by his friends which he got the blame for, or something which the teacher has imagined, or misunderstood...

...definitely payback time!

Holy Smoke...

I saw this book on Fr. Tim's blog. Thinking I could do with a little light-hearted reading matter, I went and ordered it, and then, because there was a delay in getting it from the printers or some such thing, promptly forgot about it.

I was then distracted by the arrival of Fr. William's Daughter. Having demolished that book in record time, I was just about to bemoan the fact that I was once again bereft of light reading matter, when I remembered Smoke in the Sanctuary...

...It was another unputdownable book, only this time for very different reasons. I was laughing so much: I felt I'd met so many of the characters already. And as for the dancing nuns...

If you need a little light relief, I would recommend this book. But be warned: the descriptions of liturgical dance and ecumenical services are not for the faint-hearted!

A Memorial In Stained Glass

This photo is pretty horrible... until you consider that things don't usually make it into stained glass until they're dead and buried, when suddenly all becomes cheerfulness and light...

Twitch of the mantilla to the Ironic Catholic.

A Gripping Read !

My copy of Father William's Daughter, signed by the author, arrived the other day. I managed to avoid opening the parcel for a whole 24 hours, because I suspected that it would be a good read, and I didn't need the distraction which a fascinating murder mystery would bring...

I was not disappointed. I could barely bring myself to put the book down (I think I had to on two occasions...) and positively devoured it, cover-to-cover.

My only complaint: it finished too soon.

I shall try to find out if there is another novel in the pipeline. Watch this space!

(Oh, and you can order your copy HERE.)

The Appalling Abomination...

"Brother will betray brother to death, and a father his child..." (Mark 13:12)

The quote and the post title come from the eschatological discourse of Jesus given in the Gospel of St. Mark. It was what came to mind when I considered the Human Fertilisation and Embryology Bill which has been introduced by the UK government.

I was very, very cynical when the Human Fertilisation & Embryology Authority (HFEA) held its so-called consultation meeting on the creation of human-animal hybrid embryos. I was proved right.

The Human Fertilisation and Embryology Bill is due to have its second reading on 19th November in the House of Lords.

Originally, the emphasis was on embryos which were 99% human. As the following quote from CORE (Comment on Reproductive Ethics) makes clear, this is no longer the case...

"The new Bill instead includes full hybridisation in its remit. Animal eggs combined with human sperm, and human eggs fertilised with animal sperm will be permitted if this Bill is approved.

In ethical terms this is possibly the most groundbreaking aspect of the Bill. Most of the other ethical horrors were already in place. The amended Act would simply liberalise everything even further.

One such instance of liberalisation is the extension of the use of embryo diagnosis to create matching embryos for therapeutic purposes, moving way beyond the original focus on cord blood stem cells, now to include any tissue from the designed baby. How long until this includes 'designer' kidneys and other body parts?

Something not to be overlooked is the reference to reproductive cloning. The document states blithely that the Human Reproductive Cloning Act 2001 is superseded by new provisions in the Bill. This is extremely alarming as it is not at all clear in the relevant sections whether reproductive cloning is indeed prohibited, and not least because of the continual flexibility built into the new text.

Over and over in the Bill one notes prohibitions, but they are a usually qualified with a subsequent exception clause which gives power to amend, either by adding to or repealing, simply through extended regulations."

If you only do one thing for the pro-life cause this year, make it this. Contact members of the House of Lords. SPUC have excellent resources to help - they've produced an information leaflet which you can use, and they suggest who best to approach (and how to address them and other useful stuff like that.) Or you can email your chosen member by going to the WriteToThem website.

And pray. Pray very hard.

Losing The Plot?

Several sandwiches short of a picnic. Not the full shilling. A few bricks short of a load. Lights are on, but nobody's home...

Bishop Hollis has demonstrated a severe case of foot-in-mouth disease. This disease is characterised by the sufferer opening his mouth only to change whatever foot he had in there to begin with, and dropping enough bricks to build a cathedral...

Alzheimer's has also made an early appearance: his Lordship appears to have forgotten that, as shepherd of God's flock which has been entrusted to him, his role is to uphold Catholic doctrine... (unless that requirement was waived by the Second Vatican Council. Somehow I don't think so!)

A three-week course designed to introduce foreign priests to the British way of doing things in the Roman Catholic church has opened at Ushaw College outside Durham in Northumberland, England. It was the brainchild of Bishop Hollis. I posted on the rubbish which was supposed to be taught on this course before.

It gets better... the President of Ushaw College, the Rev. Terry Drainey, has been quoted as saying, "Some foreign priests working in Britain tend to be too dogmatic about the church’s moral rightness on just about everything. That’s not how we do things here. This course shows how we deal with a whole range of issues affecting Catholics, including the role of women, divorce, the lay ministry and homosexuality."

The whole point of having foreign priests is to re-evangelise the Church in England and Wales. The "British way of doing things" has resulted in falling Mass attendance and a dearth of vocations. This is the reason we need foreign priests. No doubt Bishop Hollis's views on the legalisation of prostitution are being taught on this course as well...

Twitch of the mantilla to Ttony of The Muniment Room, Fr. Tim Finigan and Fr. Ray Blake.

Bloggers' Lunch

Bloggers of the world unite... this afternoon I was privileged to go for lunch with two eminent bloggers: Fr. Tim Finigan and Hilary White.

I managed to stay out of the photo by dint of the fact that I was wielding the camera-phone. One quick snap, and the phone was stashed away just in case any helpful person decided to suggest a threesome!

Hilary is the author of The Devout Life. She was living in Canada for many years, but has returned to Blighty, and is here to stay. I noticed that her profile picture has a neat shot of the back of her head (hey, I must've started something!) but the cat is firmly out of the bag with this photo. She has another blog - Orwell's Picnic.

A lot of people complain that modern technology interferes with "real" communication between "real" people... Can't say I've noticed that, to be honest. As Hilary said over coffee, think of the blogosphere as a small village where each of the houses just happen to be miles apart...

Healthy Living

Newhousenewjob has just been enthusing over the effects of endorphins after her session at the gym. Personally I think that the warm fuzzy glow and enthusiasm for life is due to the cream cakes she ate earlier...

It reminded me of the following health advice:

Q: I've heard that cardiovascular exercise can prolong life; is this true?

A: Your heart is only good for so many beats, and that's it... don't waste them on exercise. Everything wears out eventually. Speeding up your heart will not make you live longer - that's like saying you can extend the life of your car by driving it faster. Want to live longer? Take a nap.

Q: Should I cut down on meat and eat more fruits and vegetables?

A: You must grasp logistical efficiencies. What does a cow eat? Hay and corn. And what are these? Vegetables. So a steak is nothing more than an efficient mechanism of delivering vegetables to your system. Need grain? Eat chicken. Beef is also a good source of field grass (green leafy vegetable). And a pork chop can give you 100% of your recommended daily allowance of vegetable products.

Q: Should I reduce my alcohol intake?

A: No, not at all. Wine is made from fruit. Brandy is distilled wine, that means they take the water out of the fruity bit so you get even more of the goodness that way. Beer is also made out of grain. Bottoms up!

Q: How can I calculate my body/fat ratio?

A: Well, if you have a body and you have fat, your ratio is one to one. If you have two bodies, your ratio is two to one, etc.

Q: What are some of the advantages of participating in a regular exercise program?

A: Can't think of a single one, sorry. My philosophy is: No Pain...Good!

Q: Aren't fried foods bad for you?

A: YOU'RE NOT LISTENING!!!... Foods are fried these days in vegetable oil. In fact, they're permeated in it. How could getting more vegetables be bad for you?

Q: Will sit-ups help prevent me from getting a little soft around the middle?

A: Definitely not! When you exercise a muscle, it gets bigger. You should only be doing sit-ups if you want a bigger stomach.

Q: Is chocolate bad for me?

A: Are you crazy? HELLO! Cocoa beans! Another vegetable!!! It's the best feel-good food around!

Q: Is swimming good for your figure?

A: If swimming is good for your figure, explain whales to me.

Q: Is getting in-shape important for my lifestyle?

A: 'Round' is a shape...!

Ooooh... I Found Another One...

...another new blog, that is. Debra's Random Thoughts is described by the author as "An eclectic site created by a woman with a very short attention span."

Hmmn... wonder if she's blonde?

For someone who has only been blogging since September, Deb has an impressive collection of posts. Pop on over and say hallo...

Tenth Anniversary Celebrations

I just spotted this over at the Cardinal Winning Pro-Life Initiative. My friend, Sister Roseann Reddy (yes, I'm name-dropping again!) explains the rationale for the Initiative, and the work that they do.

To date, in the ten years they have been up and running, they have helped 2222 women, and they estimate that there are around 70 babies who would not be alive today if it were not for the work of the Initiative.

Say a prayer for them and all the wonderful work that they do.



I was amused to note that the whole video is subtitled. Perhaps they were afraid that we wouldn't understand the Scottish accents!!

How Very Odd...

I'm covering an IT lesson this afternoon. Glancing through a few of my favourite blogs, I noticed that the Dashboard was no longer blocked. Very interesting...

I wonder if it is only the Science Department's computers which have been blocked from using Blogger...

A Sense Of Humour

I bought a compilation CD of Elvis Presley's greatest hits a while back. It was a bit of nostalgia, as Elvis was one of my mother's favourite artists, and for many years it was the only music I got to listen to, not having my own record player or radio.

I checked the different albums out carefully on Amazon - I wanted one CD with all (or most) of my favourites... I didn't want a whole pile of Elvis albums!

Anyhow, I put it on the other day. Imagine my surprise when I heard "The King" doing a take-off of his own hit! I really did a double-take...

This wasn't the show where he completely fluffed his lines - this one was recorded in April 1960. He sings fake lyrics and enjoys the joke so much he goes off into fits of giggles... made worse by the operatic singer warbling in the background. I would love to have seen what was happening. Unfortunately a search of You Tube has only brought out the later "fluffed" lines videos, though I did find a recording which was set to photos and album covers.

The lyrics are supposed to go:

Are you lonesome tonight, do you miss me tonight,
are you sorry we drifted apart?
Does your memory stray to a bright summer day
when I kissed you and called you "sweetheart"?
Do the chairs in your parlour seem empty and bare?
Do you gaze at your doorstep and picture me there?...

Have a listen to Elvis having a laugh!

WooHoooo ! Another Blogging Milestone !

Time to celebrate...



I see from SiteMeter that my little blog has hit the 50,000 visitor mark. I'd just like to say that my 50,000th visitor, from Washington, in the District of Columbia (is that what DC stands for?? I've wondered for ages!) is using Verizon Internet Services, and popped over at 11:15pm last night (10 hours ago.) He/she/it then went to the comments on the post Prayers Please...

I said a prayer for you, whoever you are. Hope you enjoyed the post.