I was on sacristy duty after Mass, and His Hermeneuticalness asked after the health of Monsignors Miaowrini and Furretti. He isn't normally so solicitous of their well-being, and I was instantly suspicious. Sure enough, he pointed out that as the enrolment happened after the sermon, he had forgotten to pick up his maniple when he returned to the altar.
Everyone knows that, when you celebrate Mass without a maniple, God kills a kitten.*
After all, last year Fr. Tim said Mass in Rome without a maniple, and Cardinal Catzinger (Miaowrini's predecessor) died. I did happen to mention that, as both cats were now well over a year old, they technically didn't qualify as "kittens."**
However, I decided to make a bit of an extra fuss of the kitty cats when I got home, and cracked open the packet of smoked salmon I had bought.
Monsignor Furretti was very impressed by the tidbit, and, in her eagerness not to miss a single morsel, she went cross-eyed...
I tried to take another photo, but she wasn't going to pose for any camera. Not when smoked salmon was being proffered. Furretti just moved too quickly, and the photos were just very blurry...
Miaowrini was a little more relaxed, though equally ecstatic with the offering of salmon. She just closed her eyes and nibbled enthusiastically... so enthusiastically that I nearly lost fingers...
And, when I put down a plate of the salmon slivers, the cats decided to tolerate each other - neither wishing to cede her place to the other. Normally they wouldn't be seen dead eating from the same bowl...
*Yes, I know God doesn't really kill kittens...
**His Hermeneuticalness will be getting the vet's bill if anything does happen...
1 comment:
They will never leave you now!
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