Unfortunate Lyrics

Hymns can be tricky little things… A priest I knew a few years ago recounted the story (which from any other source I would have considered apocryphal) of a funeral he celebrated at a crematorium chapel. The family were not regular Mass-attenders and wanted a "nice" final hymn. They picked "Colours of day" without considering the first words of the chorus, which are: "So light up the fire, and let the flame burn…"

A tad too close for comfort. I risk fits of laughter whenever I have to sing that one.

Another hymn which can reduce me to a quivering wreck is one to Our Lady. In "Daily, daily, sing to Mary" the second verse runs:

"She is mighty to deliver;
call her, trust her lovingly.
When the tempest rages round thee,
she will calm the troubled sea.
Gifts of heaven she has given,
noble lady, to our race:
she, the queen, who decks her subjects,
with the light of God’s own grace."

I love the hymn - but there is something terrible in me which forms the mental picture of Mary delivering a sharp right hook and completely flooring someone…