Foot-In-Mouth Disease...

...or the "they opened their mouths and dropped enough bricks to build a cathedral" award...

'Smoking kills. If you're killed, you've lost a very important part of your life,'
-- Brooke Shields, during an interview to become spokesperson for federal anti-smoking campaign.

'I've never had major knee surgery on any other part of my body,'
-- Winston Bennett, University of Kentucky basketball forward.

'That lowdown scoundrel deserves to be kicked to death by a jackass, and I'm just the one to do it,'
-- A congressional candidate in Texas.

'It isn't pollution that's harming the environment. It's the impurities in our air and water that are doing it.'
-- Al Gore, US Vice-President.

'Traditionally, most of Australia's imports come from overseas.'
-- Keppel Enderbery.

'Your food stamps will be stopped effective March 1992 because we received notice that you passed away. May God bless you. You may reapply if there is a change in your circumstances.'
-- Department of Social Services, Greenville , South Carolina.

'If somebody has a bad heart, they can plug this jack in at night as they go to bed and it will monitor their heart throughout the night. And the next morning, when they wake up dead, there'll be a record.'
-- Mark S. Fowler, FCC Chairman.

I don't know how genuine these are: they were sent to me in an email... but they made me chuckle so I'm posting them anyway!