Customer Relations Department
Ye Olde True Love Gift Shoppe
Santa's Grotto, North Pole
Dear Sir,
You asked for 11 pipers, piping. We sent 11 pipers, piping. It is not my fault you had pan pipes in mind... you didn't ask for pan pipes. Admittedly, I did think it was a little odd for someone to want more than one bagpiper playing - they were designed to put the fear of God into the enemy, and by heaven, it works - but the customer gets what the customer wants, and we were just so pleased to have the item in stock...
Yours faithfully,
Mary Christmas.
Dagenham
ReplyDeleteTuesday
Dear Ms Christmas;
there appears to have been a misunderstanding.
When you booked our band for last night it was NOT part of the deal that a large part of it was going to be shipped off to some dreadful place south of the river and never seen again !
Please advise BY RETURN when we will be getting our eleven girls back.
(If you need permanent replacements we understand there are Shepherds in the Abruzzi who are available. Do you or your Customer have any contacts in Rome ?)
Yours &c.