How Cool Is That...?

The Vatican has its own YouTube channel, with video clips of the Holy Father, and links to relevant documents. Mantilla-twitch to Fr. Ray.

More Light Relief...

In the late 1980s and early 1990s, Barclaycard had a series of adverts starring Rowan Atkinson as a totally inept spy. The ads were so popular that the film, Johnny English was made on the back of them. Certainly this selection had me laughing until I cried, and, once again, I find myself unable to decide which one was funniest... 

"Take over for a Bough, would you moment," and "Are we about to be mugged by a gang of delinquent haddock?" were favourite catchphrases for quite some time...

Happiness...

...might not actually be a cigar called Hamlet, but sadness could quite possibly be an empty bottle of Bailey's...

One In The Eye For The Trendy Lefty Liberals...

The Pope is a huge bugbear because he's soooooo dogmatic and dictatorial and, well, censorious! The Liberal lefties who read the Guardian and its ilk much prefer trendy gurus such as the Dalai Lama... unless they actually read what he says...

Twitch of the mantilla to the Creative Minority Report.

More Traipsing Down Memory Lane...

Still no inspiration for entertaining and witty repartee in my blog posts (nothing new there, then!) Nevertheless, a comment from Fr. Owl after my last post, about how adverts used to be creative and funny (sometimes more than the programmes) got me reminiscing about a few of my favourites.

Leonard Rossiter and Joan Collins had a great set of ads for Cinzano... and four of the best are shown here. I am unable to decide which is the funniest; I find myself torn between the Japanese businessmen and the airplane recliner seat... on reflection, I'll plump for the airliner ad, as it's so very like the sort of mishap I might encounter...

Lacking Inspiration...

I have been suffering from a distinct paucity of inspiration for the blog.

I am fed up to the back teeth with everything and anything to do with the iminent Inauguration of the US President, and would be quite happy, should it be possible to do so in a purely Christian manner, to see him and his new administration at the bottom of the Potomac. Sadly, I suspect that this is not a particularly charitable train of thought, and so have decided that I must eschew all radio contact with the outside world (I don't watch TV) until Wednesday.

Apart from the media hype and hysteria about Mr. Obama, the rest of the news is depressing in the extreme (please don't misunderstand me, the media hype and hysteria is also depressing, but at least the presenters sound slightly more cheerful.) I have found a little solace in cat pictures, marzipan, chocolate and German sausage, but I feel I have exhausted the blogging possibilities associated with these topics, at least for the time being.

It would seem that I'm not the only blogger to have been suffering from writers' block. Phil (he of the Ponte Sisto) was stumped for a topic on which to expound, and he decided to overcome the impediment by writing about a day in his life. He claimed that it was very uneventful and boring. Not so... In fact, his description of how he went to a photo booth in order to obtain a passport photo had me giggling, as it made me recall the Hamlet ads of my misbegotten youth...

Having worked out how to deselect the “fun” options – my face, superimposed on a bunny rabbit, or Madonna sat on my knee – I inserted the correct change and pressed the green button. It spoke! The machine spoke to me: “Please ensure that you are sitting comfortably and position your face in the orange circle”. I was a little too tall and attempted to lower the seat, but with no success. Having decided that the seat was stuck, I slouched down until my face fitted within the circle and my eyes were in line with the image on screen. It was only after the picture was taken, that I realized the camera was looking up my nose (due to the necessary slouching)

I thought that a reminder of the advert in question might prove to be a welcome diversion...

Normal blogging service will be resumed shortly...

Time For Another Cat Post...

This photo reminded me of one I'd seen a while back... over at Cavey's blog, in fact!

I can see a definite resemblance, which suggests that my favourite Caveman is probably nothing more than a big pussycat inside...

(Ok, now I think I better go hide before the Caveman catches up with me...)

One Million Visitors...

No, not on this blog!! Well, not yet... give me a couple more years.

Fr. Tim Finigan, aka His Hermeneuticalness, is approaching the 1,000,000 visitor mark. He estimates that it should be some time this evening.

Anyone care to lay bets as to when exactly?

Carbon Footprints And All That...

Yet another picture which made me chuckle... it isn't a picture of a cat, so I don't have to wait before posting it!

A Late Christmas Present...

I came home a little late this evening, after a full day's teaching and an evening Confirmation class, to find a rather large parcel on my doormat.

I knew it was coming, but I didn't know exactly when it would arrive, and so its presence outside my door was a welcome bonus. I manoeuvred it inside, fed the cat (he has me well trained) and went in search of something sharp with which to shred the packing tape.

The friend who had sent the parcel had warned me that she'd been unable to get a smaller box, and rather than incurring a delay, she'd opted for a large box and lots of padding. She wasn't kidding. I was therefore under strict instructions to check the padding for any small items which might accidentally escape. Needless to say, this friend of mine hasn't known me all that long, or she would have realised how unnecessary such instructions would be.

I had sent some traditional English sweets over to my friend just before Christmas, as she teaches English, and she wanted to make her lessons a little more interesting... teenagers always respond well to foodstuffs. Rather than sending over the dreadful English excuse for chocolate (aka Cadbury's), I went to a little sweetshop near me and bought a selection of proper, old-fashioned sweets, that were kept in jars and weighed out. In my childhood it was "a quarter" of whatever sweet you wanted, meaning a quarter pound (4 oz). Now the sweets are priced up per 100g, but the principle was the same. I sent acid drops, rhubarb and custard, strawberry and creams, barley sugars, cough candy, lemon sherbets and so on.

I think they were well received. My friend wanted to know how she could reciprocate, and, after seeing some comments on my blog, told me that she'd send some coffee and chocolate. I forestalled her: after initially protesting that she didn't need to do anything in return, I confessed to a hankering for German sausage. Proper German sausage. I also admitted to a weakness for marzipan. The marzipan you get in England is a pretty poor excuse for marzipan (rather like the chocolate) and is sold for cake-making in big blocks. My grandmother's Christmas parcels had always included proper marzipan...

As you can see, the sausages were included with the parcel, along with some mustard and a postcard of the Holy Father. The sausages are vacuum-packed (just as well, or the sniffer dogs at Customs would have had a hard time of it) but, being proper German sausages sold loose, there are no cooking instructions, and I have had to email my friend for a reminder as to what I should do with them...

The selection of marzipan dainties was amazing. But this wasn't really what I remembered from my childhood Christmasses about marzipan...

What I really remembered was the (very German) sense of humour. German sausage is often sold from kiosks, with mustard or ketchup, and served on little paper plates. Here you can see a typical "take-away," though the sausage is much smaller than normal...

...it is, of course, actually made of marzipan. All of it. Mustard as well. The plate is real paper...

My friend also sent me some coffee beans... wrapped in chocolate!

All in all, a very welcome present...

Cafeteria-Catholic Google...

Ever wondered how the likes of Lavinia Byrne, Cristina Odone and Cherie Blair manage to call themselves Catholic without actually following any of those inconvenient "teachings" of the Church? Well, the Curt Jester has let the cat out of the bag. Apparently, it is possible to use Liberal Catholic Google to screen out all those pesky Vatican documents, not to mention nasty biblical references to unpleasant subjects such as "sin" and "hell"...

About Us

Are you tired of using search terms that give you a bunch of results that you don't want? That you have to go through page after page of results to find answers that match what you want?

If so then liberalcatholicgoogle.com is the site for you!

Our specialized search algorithm will give you the results you want without a bunch of search chaff. No more will you find such sites as catholic.com, Catholic Encyclopedia, etch cluttering up your search results. Though one problem is that even among us progressive Catholics there are people who accept one so-called "dogma" and not another. When we pick and choose what we accept from the hierarchical Church it is not surprising that others pick and choose a different set. But we are a big tent Church and to accommodate this LiberalCatholicGoogle will further filter your search results based on your theological prospective.

When you go to our configuration page you will see a selection of check boxes such as for example:

 Abortion  Contraception  Divorce  Homosexual Acts  Homosexual Marriage  Jesus is God  Jesus is one of many paths  Magisterium  Obedience  Papal Infallibility  Personal Infallibility  Women's Ordination

Just check off the items that best match what you accept.

Or you can just check off

 National Catholic Reporter Reader

And the checkmarks will be checked accordingly.

After then after answering a short questionnaire you're off to search results matched perfectly to what you already believe!

No more will you be bothered with pesky Vatican documents such as Humanae Vitae or annoying quotes from the Church Fathers in your search results. You will find plenty of content from the National Catholic Reporter, Commonweal, America, and other great Catholic sources such as the New York Times and the Washington Post.

Now sometimes you actually want something from a source such as the Vatican or Scripture. In these cases simply checkmark  Vatican Safe Search and/or Scripture Safe Search

With Vatican Safe Search on - we have a special search algorithm first developed for Cherie Blair. The search will go through Vatican documents using the specialized search pick also known as the Cherie pick to return passages of documents that best match your search preferences and search terms. The Cherie pick also works perfectly wellwithScripture Safe Search - on. You will be sure to get scripture such as"judge not' without results such as "go and sin no more" or mean passages from homophobic St Paul. Within seconds you will have select passages to prove to other Catholics whatever you want!

Not convinced yet? Well take a look at a sample of real world search results and you will be:

 

Planned Parenthood Federation of America, Inc.
Donate to Planned Parenthood. Schedule an abortion.
www.plannedparenthood.org/ - 56k

Catholics for Choice
Works in partnership with reproductive health, interfaith and Catholic church reform groups that share the commitment to safe, legal reproductive health ...
www.catholicsforchoice.org/ - 22k

NARAL Pro-Choice Massachusetts : News
Dec 16, 2008 ... NARAL Pro-Choice Massachusetts releases results of a survey of ... Responses from both Catholic and secular hospitals indicate that they may ...
www.prochoicemass.org/news/echosp2008.shtml - 19k

Commonweal - A review of religion, politics and culture
Why Mario Cuomo is a hero for first using personally opposed but ...
www.commonwealmagazine.org

EMILY's List
Supporting pro-choice Democratic women running for congress and governor.
www.emilyslist.org/

Writer's Desk: June 26, 2006
National Catholic Reporter is a nonprofit organization. Contributions are tax- deductible in the ... Understand, I am no absolutist on the abortion issue. ...
www.nationalcatholicreporter.org/todaystake/index.htm

Amazon.com: A Brief, Liberal, Catholic Defense of Abortion: Daniel ...
" A Brief, Liberal, Catholic Defense of Abortion" argues that the current Catholic anti-abortion stance is justified neither by modern embryology nor by ...
www.amazon.com/Brief-Liberal-Catholic-Defense-Abortion/dp/0252025504 - 287k

Pro-abortion Senator Joe Biden
The next Republican that tells me I'm not religious, I'm going to shove my rosary beads down their throat.. ...
www.joebiden.com/ - 9k

Barack Obama and Joe Biden: The Change We Need
Jan 22, 2008 ... And I will continue to defend this right by passing the Freedom of Choice Act as president. "Moreover, I believe in and have supported ...
www.barackobama.com/2008/01/22/obama_statement_on_35th_annive.php - 41k -

My First Award For 2009...

Admittedly, it's probably going to be my only award in 2009, but let's skate over that bit. My favourite Caveman has seen fit to bestow upon me none other than the Superior Scribbler Award.

So, whassat when it's at home?

Read on, my crayon-toting friend, and learn...

* Each Superior Scribbler must in turn pass the award on to 5 most-deserving Bloggy Friends.

* Each Superior Scribbler must link to the author and the name of the blog from whom he/she has received the Award.

* Each Superior Scribbler must display the award on his/her blog, and link to this post, which explains the award.

* Each Blogger who wins the Superior Scribbler Award must visit this post and add his/her name to the Mr. Linky List (scroll down). That way, we’ll be able to keep up-to-date on everyone who receives this prestigious honour!

* Each Superior Scribbler must post these rules on his/her blog.

I hereby designate as Superior Scribblers:

1.  Fr. Ray Blake.

2.  Leutgeb

3.  Karen

4.  Paulinus

5.  Ttony

I'm also awarding it to Fr. Tim, but (a) he probably won't notice, and (b) he probably won't get round to passing it on, as it's like a meme, and he thinks they're a bit "girly"...

Words Of Wisdom...

If it looks like a duck, walks like a duck and talks like a duck...

...it probably needs a little longer in the microwave.

Calendar Confusion...

I find myself drawn more and more to the Extraordinary Form of Mass, and am also fortunate enough to be able to indulge myself in this respect, as we have a regular Sunday morning Missa Cantata. Saturday morning Mass is also in the Extraordinary Form.

The confusion for me arises with the Calendar of Saints because I also pray the Divine Office... but the Novus Ordo one! I haven't switched to the Old Breviary because my Latin is almost non-existent... though I'm picking it up through typing up the propers for Mass for our choir. 

I'd quite like to pray the Old Rite Breviary, but need a Latin-English version. I understand that Baronius Press are in the process of producing one, though there is, as yet, no publication date. Has anyone got any suggestions...?

A Manuel Moment...

I went out for dinner this evening. There were a few communication issues with the waiter...

"A cappuccino, an espresso and a Remy Martin, please."

"Cappuccino, espresso, and, uhhhhhh..."

"A brandy."

"Ahhh! Brandy! Which one?"

"Remy Martin."

"Ahhh... Remy... OK."

Manuel lives...

A Gangster's Guide To God...

John Pridmore came to the parish this evening. He gave an excellent talk to a packed church, explaining his conversion experience. He's a very inspiring and charismatic speaker, and he did his utmost to explain how his former life was empty and unfulfilling, despite appearing to be everything a man could want.

If you ever get the opportunity to hear him speak, make sure you go. I would also recommend his books: From Gangland to Promised Land and Gangster's Guide to God.

Prayer Time...

I received the following information via email. I have to confess to having been short-sighted enough to mentally assign the Freedom of Choice Act to "things American which I can't do anything about."

As this email made clear, you don't have to be a US citizen to pray about it...

The Freedom of Choice Act (FOCA) is set to be signed if the US Congress passes it on January 21-22, 2009. If made a law then all limitations on abortion will be lifted which will result in the following:

1) All hospitals, including Catholic hospitals will be required to perform abortions upon request. If this happens Bishops vow to close down all Catholic hospitals, more then 30% of all hospitals in the United States.
2) Partial birth abortions would be legal and have no limitations.
3) All U.S. tax payers would be funding abortions.
4) Parental notification will no longer be required.
5) The number of abortions will increase by a minimum of 100,000 annually.

Perhaps most importantly the government will now have control in the issue of abortion. This could result in a future amendment that would force women by law to have abortions in certain situations (rape, Downs Syndrome babies, etc.) and could even regulate how many children women are allowed to have. Needless to say this information is disturbing, but sadly true. As Catholics, as Christians, as anyone who is against the needless killing of innocent children, we must stand as one. We must stop this horrific act before it becomes a law.

The Plan :
To say a novena (9 days of prayer) along with fasting (for at least two days) starting on January 11th. For Catholics, the prayer of choice will be the rosary with intentions to stop the FOCA. For non-Catholics I encourage you to pray your strongest prayers with the same intentions, also for nine consecutive days. The hope is that this will branch and blossom as to become a global effort with maximum impact. We have very little time so we all must act fast. 

Remember that with God all things are possible and the power of prayer is undeniable. If you are against the senseless killing of defenseless children then the time is now to do something about it!

Usus Antiquior Launch Countdown...

At the launch of the journal Usus Antiquior, which I attended last September, a competition for the design of the journal was opened. The winning entry has now been announced, and you can see it (and some of the runners up) on the New Liturgical Movement.

The following appeal was also added...

Similarly, we must thank those who have so kindly donated to the journal, howsoever modestly. Your financial support at this crucial time – when we have no other income whatsoever – has facilitated much of the hidden practical and academic work we have accomplished thus far. We need, however, to appeal for further donations in order to sustain this work in the coming year when the administrative structures of the journal must be established and the process of advertising it to seminaries, religious houses and academic institutions must be begun. Contributions, however small, will all help to ensure the journal’s quality and success, and may be made on our website or by post. God bless you for your generosity!

In the coming months arrangements for the management of subscriptions as well as the production and distribution of the journal will be finalised. Subscriptions will open on our website on 7th July 2009 when the contents of the first edition will also be announced.

Donations can be made from the journal website. Twitch of the mantilla to Fr. Tim.

New(ish) Blogs Discovered...

For some strange reason, for the past couple of days, I've had more than 300 visitors. I can't quite figure out what has caused the daily stats to go up (not that I'm complaining) as the referrals don't appear to be any one particular blog or website...

In examining the list of referrals, I've noticed one or two new blogs. I am, unfortunately, still unable to edit my blogroll, and have been too busy/lazy/ill to begin the mammoth task of transferring all my links to another system. So, I thought I'd mention one or two in a post...

First up is the engagingly named "That The Bones You Have Crushed May Thrill," written by Laurence England. He's only been blogging since last September, but has managed quite an impressive output. I laughed out loud when I read his post on taking the environmental message of the Bishops' Conference seriously...

Cookie is the first female member of the Lair of the Catholic Cavemen (not including the House Sergeant Major, who is the non-blogging wife of Cavey, the Vir Speluncae Catholicus.) I did worry that Cavey and his chums had gone all PC on us, but Cookie appears refreshingly direct. She also has her own blog, The Holy Cookie.

The Lazy Disciple appears to be living up to his name... though I think that being a husband, father and PhD student at the Gregorian University in Rome might explain the dearth of blog posts since he started back in 2006... heheheheh!

David Palmer is a re-entry in the Blog stakes... he stopped blogging about a year ago, but has succumbed to the lure of the Blogosphere, and is up and running again with a new blog, The Fullness of Faith (albeit with the old name) and a particular emphasis on Islam and how it affects the Church.

Kit describes herself as mother of three, wonderful, well-loved children, wife of an amazing man, scolder of dogs, herder of cats, and tamer of an otherwise feral cockatiel. She also finds the time to write By The Brook, the chronicles of a Catholic mom, wife, lawyer, professor, daughter, sister, mentor, boss and employee embarked on the perilous journey past 40. She appears to be almost as accident-prone as me, as her post detailing eye injuries sustained in the dentist's chair and with a mascara wand testifies...

Finally, Fr. John Abberton, Parish Priest of Holy Spirit, Heckmondwike, Yorkshire, is the author of Stella Maris. He has a particularly strong Marian devotion, being, I think, a Third Order Carmelite (I assume that's what "TOC" stands for!) and a member of the Marian Movement of Priests. If it's the Marian Movement I'm thinking of, I first heard of the Movement when I was in Camberwell, just after my return to the Faith, and I heard more about it at the Padre Pio bookshop in Vauxhall Bridge Road, Victoria... seeing Fr. John's reference to the Marian Movement really took me back a few years!

Question Time...

Ok, as a relative newbie to the Extraordinary Form (I've attended Mass for a while, but have only been following the EF Ordo since last Easter, or thereabouts) I've got a quick question.

I get the impression that Septuagesima is penitential, (heheheh) but in what way, exactly, is it different from Lent? I mean, Lent still starts on Ash Wednesday in the EF calendar, so presumably Lenten fasting etc. starts then too... so what are the penitential "practices" (if any) which happen at Septuagesima?

Just wondering...